Sunday, April 12, 2009

This is

Welcome to CNN dot com dot com. For all the relevant news, information and stories about

With an Alexa ranking of 52, successfully serves hard hitting news to the widest array of viewers on the internet. Their journalistic integrity and brutally honest reporting lets the heartland of America discover the ins and outs of the latest scandal in Washington, a brutal tragedy in Washington or a mundane not interesting at all fact about something that happened in Washington.

Just to give you an idea of some of the hard hitting journalism that's been hitting the internet presses, the following is a list of actual headlines taken from
  • Clothes-stealing cat victimizes neighbors - Hard hitting. I don't know who that cat is, but if he's victimizing any kind of neighbors, it deserves to be on the front page of
  • Girl kisses mom, leaves to play, vanishes - Not so much a news story as it seems a cliff notes version of a Hardy boys novel. The Mystery of the Girl who Kissed her Mom.
  • 12-foot python puts squeeze on reporter - I'm happy that the home page references a snake attack with a cute pun. Hard-hitting.
  • Naked pole vaulter runs city's streets - After I read the article I understood that the pole vaulter ran through the city's streets. At first I thought he was king.
  • Charles Manson spends most of his time alone - Oh. I guess when you think about that it makes sense. I mean, he is in jail.
  • Hand-holding family no match for tornado - Speaks for itself.
  • Bowler rolls perfect game, then dies - I thought this one was bad enough. But three minutes later they changed it to: "Guy bowls 300, falls over dead." Tragic.
I guess what I'm trying to say with this blog is... is a joke.

No comments:

Post a Comment